YOU
– life in the 21st century The
REAL Christmas Hangover For
literally millions of people the Christmas hangover does
not refer to how they feel on Boxing Day. Rather,
it is the dawning realization that they over-committed
their spending over the Festive Season and as the credit
and store card bills come through the door in mid-January
there is a realization that they cannot be re-paid. Every
debt counselling agency in the country will be having
their busiest time in the next couple of months. Why
do we do it? Sadly Christmas, which we all know is really
about the wonderful free gift of Jesus has been
commercially hijacked. What is more we have somehow
bought into the lie that somehow the more we spend on
some-one the more we must love them. This
is intolerable pressure. I used to have the debt help-line
connected to my home phone number over Christmas Day and
I can remember one day a young mum ringing me up in
floods of tears. Apparently her husband had left her some
months before and although she was struggling financially
she did not want her three year old to 'go without'. So
she purchased all the presents the advertisements told
her a three year old would really love – and through
her tears she told me how he had spent Christmas morning
playing with the box. One
fact that many people do not know is about the repayment
of interest on credit cards – and also about late
penalty charges. Logic would tell you that if you
borrowed £1000 and repaid £800 you would pay interest
on the balance of £200. But this is not true. If you do
not clear your account in full every month you will be
charged interest on the full amount borrowed [in this
case £1000]. Some
cards allow you to pay a minimum repayment of just two
per cent of what is owed and about one in eight of us
simply do that. We should not do this, as it could take
us over forty years to pay back. Missed payments can also
lead to huge additional costs and many people who have
really over-committed fall into such a trap at this time
of year. If
any of you are struggling please ring our sister charity
CCCS on 0800 1381111 for free debt advice. Let
me leave with you one statistic. It is estimated that the
amount of money we spend extra in This
article was written by Keith Tondeur of Credit Action My
Husband 1.0 February
is the month of love and romance. But what happens
next? Dear
Tech Support, Last
year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and
noticed that the new program began making unexpected
changes to the accounting software; severely limiting
access to wardrobe, flower and jewellery applications
that operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. No mention
of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure. In
addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalls many other valuable
programs such as DinnerDancing 7.5, CruiseShip 2.3, and
OperaNight 6.1 and installs new, undesirable programs
such as SnookerNight 1.3, SaturdayFootball 5.0, Golf 2.4
and ClutterEverywhere 4.5. Conversation 8.0 no longer
runs, and invariably crashes the system. Under no
circumstances will it run NappyChanging 14.1 or
HouseCleaning 2.6. I've
tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix Husband 1.0, but this
all purpose utility is of limited effectiveness. Can you
help, please!!!! Dear
Jane: This
is a very common problem women complain about, but it is
mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people
upgrade from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 with no idea
that Boyfriend 5.0 is merely an ENTERTAINMENT package. However,
Husband 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and was designed by
its creator to run as few applications as possible.
Further, you cannot purge Husband 1.0 and return to
Boyfriend 5.0, because Husband 1.0 is not designed to do
this. Hidden operating files within your system would
cause Boyfriend 5.0 to emulate Husband 1.0, so nothing is
gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge
the program files from the system, once installed. Any
new program files can only be installed once per year, as
Husband 1.0 has severely limited memory. Error
messages are common, and a normal part of Husband 1.0. In
desperation to play some of their "old time"
favourite applications, or to get new applications to
work, some women have tried to install Boyfriend 6.0, or
Husband 2.0. However, these women end up with more
problems than encountered with Husband 1.0. Look in your
manual under "Warnings: Divorce/Child Support".
You will notice that this program runs very poorly, and
comes bundled with HeartBreak 1.3. I recommend you keep
Husband 1.0, and just learn the quirks of this strange
and illogical system. Having
Husband 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you
read the entire section regarding General Partnership
Faults [GPFs]. This is a wonderful feature of Husband 1.0,
secretly installed by the parent company as an integral
part of the operating system. Husband 1.0 must assume ALL
responsibility for ALL faults and problems, regardless of
root cause. To activate this great feature enter the
command "C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME". Sometimes
Tears 6.2 must be run simultaneously while entering the
command. Husband 1.0 should then run the applications
Apologize 12.3 and Flowers/Chocolates 7.8. TECH
TIP! Avoid excessive use of this feature. Overuse can
create additional and more serious GPFs, and ultimately
YOU may have to give a C:\ I APOLOGIZE command before the
system will return to normal operations. Overuse can also
cause Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, or
worse yet, to Beer 6.0. Beer 6.0 is a very bad program
that causes Husband 1.0 to create FatBelly files and
SnoringLoudly wave files that are very hard to delete.
Save yourself some trouble by following this tech tip! Just
remember! The system will run smoothly, and take the
blame for all GPFs, but because of this fine feature it
can only intermittently run all the applications
Boyfriend 5.0 ran. Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it
does have limited memory and cannot learn new
applications quickly. Consider
buying additional software to improve performance. I
personally recommend HotFood 3.0, Lingerie 5.3 and
Patience 10.1. Used in conjunction, these utilities can
really help keep Husband 1.0 running smoothly. After
several years of use, Husband 1.0 will become familiar
and you will find many valuable embedded features such as
FixBrokenThings 2.1, Snuggling 4.2 and BestFriend 7.6. A
final word of caution! Do NOT, under any circumstances,
install MotherInLaw 1.0. This is not a supported
application, and will cause selective shutdown of the
operating system. Husband 1.0 will run only Fishing 9.4
and Hunting 5.2 until MotherInLaw 1.0 is uninstalled. I
hope these notes have helped. Thank you for choosing to
install Husband 1.0 and we here at Tech Support wish you
the best of luck in coming years. We
trust you will learn to fully enjoy this product! Teenagers
left to their own devices Modern
technology is alienating teenagers from their parents to
such an extent that half of young people today prefer to
spend time on their own rather than with their family,
according to recent research. Computer games,
mobile phones and televisions in bedrooms are producing a
generation of loners. Sadly,
it seems that in many cases modern technology has now
replaced the family unit, so that everyone does whatever
they want, when they want, even if it means doing it on
their own. Christian
MPs raise joint debate on family issues Late
last year, members of the Christian Fellowship in
Parliament raised a debate on family policy. “That
families are under acute pressure in our times is
undeniable. Marriage is at its lowest level in the Gym'll
fix your insurance From
this Spring, people who regularly work out at the gym are
to be offered lower private medical insurance premiums.
PruHealth policyholders will be assessed annually for
signs of improved health. If they show that they
have regularly attended the gym or given up smoking, they
can expect lower premiums. Insurance
company Prudential announced the move with news that it
is teaming up with health and fitness companies Cannons
and Are
you restless in your job? If
so, you are not alone. It seems that millions of us
are longing to do something different. According
to a recent survey by City & Guilds, the vocational
awarding body, one in three of us (33 per cent) is
planning to change careers, with one in five of us (17
per cent) daydreaming about getting our hands dirty in a
more practical or outdoor job. For
example, it seems that 13 per cent of lawyers would like
to desert the courtroom for a farm or greenhouse, while
13 per cent of architects privately dream of becoming an
artist or cartoonist. Do
you want to be your own boss? That is the reason 17
per cent of us swap careers. Are
you a self-starter? You are most likely to be so if
you work in the media (40 per cent), engineering (33 per
cent), or as a pharmacist (25 per cent). If
your office stresses you out, take comfort that you are
among 20 per cent of the population. If you are fed
up with administration, you are among 17 per cent of us. Watch
out if you are approaching a milestone age: that is
why 26 per cent of us decide to jump out of our career
into something different. But talking to your
friends can be just as dangerous (21 per cent) or even
watching an inspirational TV programme (19 per cent). If
you weren't restless before you read this article, you
may well be, by now! Sugar
Lips In
Elizabethan times, lavender kissing comfits had a racy
reputation – they were supposed to make men amorous.
Comfits are strongly flavoured sweets coated with many
layers of liquid sugar, flavoured with orange, rose,
violet or lavender flower water. You
can make them: Mix
6oz/170g of very finely ground granulated white sugar
with half a cup/118cc hot lavender water and add a few
drops of blue food colour. Pour
into a heavy-bottomed saucepan or small cast iron skillet
and stir over a low heat, until the sugar melts and
becomes clear. Pour
about half a cup/118cc of coriander, caraway or fennel
seeds, pine nuts or almonds into a bowl. Shake the
bowl while spooning the syrup over the contents. Keep
stirring the nuts or seeds with a fork until they are
white and separated. Coat them sparingly but
repeatedly, with more syrup each time, then place on a
baking sheet to cool. Finally,
find a loved one. Feed them a comfit. And
then kiss! |